Thursday, 28 March 2013


*I'm not going to be holding back with the swearing in this post, it's necessary, so avert your eyes if you're offended...*

FML is one of my favourite phrases at the mo. I learnt it from Jazz who speaks almost entirely in internet phrases. It means 'fuck my life' (and also, apparently, 'fix my lighthouse'. Whatevs). It's a brill phrase that sums up a lot of life's little frustrations and I use it a lot. Me, Marsh Marsh and Verity have expanded it to include FYL and FOL - 'fuck your life' and 'fuck our lives' respectively. Both of these are apparently 'things' according to the urban dictionary but we most definitely made them up.

Separately from this, some bastard crack addict broke into the shop earlier this month. He smashed the little window above the shop which we had to get fixed and I decided to put some bars up behind the glass to put off any potential burgling bastards. Dave did it. Can you remember Dave? He did some work for us a few years ago - a proper friend to the shop. :)

There he is - lovely Dave. 

Anyway, they look a bit.... stark... I hate them. I can't stop myself looking at them and I feel like I'm in a prison and I'm pissed off that some scummy bugger has made me feel like that. So my only option was to prettify them wasn't it? I wrote a bit about it here

And here's the result:

Dead hard to get a good photo of....

You know how much I love morse code in crochet. Well I thought that if anybody's up there I might as well write them a message. And if you're six feet up in the air, on Mansfield Road, about to break into a yarn shop (instead of the myriad booze shops, electronic shops, pubs etc. etc.) then really.... FYL.

It makes me feel better anyway.

But of course, who knows morse code now? And they just look like pretty stripes don't they? So I thought I'd give them a clue - that's where the bunting came into play. I'm sure it's not readable from street level so whoever is up there to read it is about to break in (or wash the windows... unlikely...). Maybe if they do read it, they'll stop to google what the stripes mean and then their conscience will kick in and they'll clamber back down. Hmm. I'll shut up now.

They could probably do with a press though....

And lastly, I wanted to talk about one last little thing. Look here:

I know, I know, it's a terrible photo but can you guess my favourite part?

Well I did worry Bob, I did. I loved my three little birds. I used to say hello to them every morning and goodbye every night (unless somebody else is there of course - don't want them to think I'm weird). They were smashed in the great burglary of 2013 and I was pissed off! I was also a little touched when people asked about them - you noticed them too! 

So on Saturday night, happily crocheting my bunting whilst catching up on Attic 24, I was struck by the inspiration to use her love Little Birdie Decoration pattern to make three replacement birdies, each one smaller than the last like little avian Russian dolls. I'm dead pleased that I did.

So that's it, fully prettified and I'm pleased and I hope if you ever decide to break into a yarn shop you stop and think 'fml' - because, honestly and truly - fuck your life. 

Love Eleanor. :)

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